And the Crowdfunding Begins...

Week 5: The staff have been so busy this week they haven’t paid us nearly enough attention. We let them off on this occasion as they began crowdfunding. www.buzzbnk.org/konekocatcafe 

It’s important having staff that do work hard and our staff are working very hard to make sure our café opens.

Sir Fluffington: That pesky little dog is still coming here and whilst I can’t say I really approve it definitely is an interesting species to study. Its behaviours are so peculiar; why do you tug on rope? What is fun about that? I’d much rather chase paper airplanes.

We’re starting to get used to the harnesses that the staff sometimes put on us. We’ve been told it’s so we can go outside next week. We’re not so sure about outside though, sounds like it could be scary; things look big outside, really big. We’ll see on that one and tell you next week. To prepare we’ve even been out in the hallway of the building. That was scary at first. The floor was cold, there was an ugly rug and it was big and open, with no cat tower. Can you imagine a place without a cat tower? Preposterous, we know.      

Sir Fluffington: Last week Sushi accused me of only pretending to be brave when the hoover is about. I can assure you all that I am no more scared of the hoover than I am of a fly (I find flies quite delectable, not that the hoover is tasty…that I know of).

Back to the dog…when it sees us now it takes blooming liberties. It jumps on us all the time and licks us, ruining our soft shiny coat. We have to wash for hours afterwards. We decided that despite this we can play with it a bit; we are civilised after all and it would be rude just to ignore it, even if it is just a dog.

Sushi: Now I know I admitted my one true love is armpits, but I may have found something even better! Reflected light! The way it glistens, the way it moves, I can’t keep my eyes off it, it’s simply beautiful.

Sir Fluffington: If you ask me, which of course you are asking, I’d say Sushi is a bit doolally when it comes to reflected light. She evens chatters at it, can be a bit off putting at times when I’m partaking in a quick gander it some.

We’re happy to hear that the people of Brighton are starting to hear about our cat café as when the staff went to give flyers into shops, around half had already heard of our amazing future café.

Even at the end of the week the staff barely had to time to play with us enough because they were busy http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/a-cat-cafe-for-brighton-and-hove-actually  as that way PayPal is accepted. Personally we think your concept of money is a bit silly anyway, surely trading fish and catnip would better, you could always wash each other. For instance say you need some salmon for dinner, you’d have to give the cashier at the supermarket two licks, a house on the other hand would cost a month of washes. You humans would be a lot cleaner too.

setting up more crowdfunding, this time with indiegogo:

The week hasn’t all been smooth running though, apparently the cats protection think the staff are going to exploit us. Little do they know we’re the ones exploiting the staff. They’ve been working flat out for 6 months and we haven’t paid them a penny or given them any time off, the staff are lucky we allow them the time to play with us. The cats protection also believe we won’t be happy in a cat café. If we weren’t going to be happy why would we open a cat café in the first place? Also they add that we’ll be stressed. Anyone who

has run a business will tell you, it’s stressful, the more people that come in the less stressed we’ll be because the cat café will be doing well. In all seriousness the staff have reassured us that we will have a room separate from the public as well as plenty of high places where people won’t be able to reach us so that we can lord over everyone in style. There will be at least 20 perches for us and our kitty friends and 11 nice hiding places as that is recommended by experts. We’ve done the research as despite being happy to exploit our staff, our kitty friends on the other hand are extraordinarily important. The Humane Society of the United States who are far more forward thinking than the old fashioned cat protection here believe that a space of 10ft x 15ft is fine for up to ten cats. Also a director at the cats protection admitted to the staff that they do not deal with cat welfare and could not advise on cat cafés so they’re just guessing based on their old fashioned rehoming system anyway.